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Hello, Miss Xia. My mother divorced my father when I was five years old, and then she took me to make a living. I will never forget the way my mother refused to borrow money for me. She came back in the rain in winter and cried in the kitchen while cooking for me. I can't forget that my mother worked two jobs a day to collect my tuition fees. After fainting, she lay at home for three days. She didn't go to the hospital, couldn't eat or drink soup, and survived those days.
When I was in junior high school, she started some small businesses and made a little money. Later, she opened a restaurant and the business has always been very good. Maybe it's not easy for her to bring up a child alone. She always tells me that a girl wants to marry a rich man. She thinks she married my poor father because of love, but finally she divorced because of poverty.
But I don't think so. When I was 22 years old, I met a man who was 27 years old, divorced once and had no children. I first pursued him. At first, he said that I was too young and that he had divorced and refused to live or die. Later, when I messed with him, he agreed to try with me. When he was in love, he didn't tell me about his ex-wife, nor did I ask. I think he is so good, but even so, I dare not let my mother know that I am in love with him.
Later, we also reached the point of getting married. He has been hesitant, saying that he is not sure whether we can really get along well when we get married. I was angry because of his hesitation. Later, he apologized to me and said he would work hard with me. I took him home to see my mother. My mother heard that he was divorced, but the conditions were not very good, so she didn't agree. I begged my mother for a long time, and then my mother relented and said that as long as he could get 50000 betrothal gifts, he would marry me to him.
I was very happy to hear my mother let go, but I never expected that he would refuse. He said that he would not pay any bride price. My mother was so angry that she swept him out of the house. I was so angry that I quarreled with him on the phone for a long time. I said, "Is it more than 50000 yuan?"? My mother just saw that I was going to marry you and give you a step down. What is it to give no betrothal gifts? You have no sincerity to marry me!
I yelled at him on the phone like an aunt, but he calmly didn't say anything, as if he didn't want to be with me from the beginning. Am I really wrong? If a girl takes the initiative to pursue a man, does it really make him feel that he can abuse me casually? Anyway, I will not leave without a face. Later, I argued with him. I thought my mother might be right. I broke up with him.
In the following week, we had no communication. In fact, it is the same at ordinary times. As long as I do not take the initiative to find him, he will not take the initiative to contact me. I admit that there were some factors that forced him to apologize when I said breaking up on the phone, but he seemed to really decide that we should just break up.
Later, he came to me and explained the reason. He said, "I met my ex-wife on a blind date. My feelings were very ordinary. At that time, I had a factory, and my life was relatively rich. But after marriage, she lost all the money in her family by playing cards, leaving a pile of debts, and fled alone.". He never told me about these things before. He said that he sold the factory, found a job and paid off his debt slowly, but because his ex-wife had left him too much shadow, he could not give his money to women anymore, not to mention that he could not give 50000 yuan now.
I can understand him, but I think he still doesn't trust me and doesn't believe that I am different from his ex-wife. But I loved him, so I told him that I would not accept the 50 thousand gift money, and I would only marry him. I told my mother about him and said I don't want the gift money. I just want to marry him.
My mother was very angry, but I stole my account book. After a long stalemate, my mother reluctantly agreed. When I got engaged, my boyfriend still couldn't give me any betrothal gifts. My mother was so angry that she bought me a house with 600000 yuan as a dowry. Although she only paid the down payment and there were hundreds of thousands of dollars in loans, I was still very grateful to my mother. My mother also said to him, "Our family doesn't look up to your little money at all. Just be nice to my daughter.". In fact, he is very good when he treats me well. He washes clothes and cooks for me, cooks soup and sends it to my company, and always picks me up after work
Since my mother bought a house for me, the wedding is also going to be held, but my mother-in-law asked me to get pregnant quickly. When I asked, she knew that she wanted to live in the city. However, I promised my mother that I would let my mother take care of the children after marriage. I want my mother to live with me. But when my mother-in-law found out that I was not filial, she cried loudly at home. My husband means that he can't leave his mother-in-law alone. What should I do? Can I still get married?
Summer replied:
Girl, you should always believe that when your parents chose to divorce, your mother chose to live with you, which shows that you are very important in her heart, and even her courage and hope to live. Therefore, at any time, you should listen to your mother's opinion. Only she is sincere to you.
You chase your boyfriend. He is divorced. In your relationship mode, you are the active side, but he is very passive. In this relationship, you give a lot, but you get little love and security.
In fact, your boyfriend did not come out of the previous marriage, and the trauma and shadow caused by that marriage continued to your body. Therefore, he is afraid of being cheated again, does not trust you, and dare not love you. Moreover, his pattern of getting along with his ex-wife may also extend to you, so you should think calmly, does this man really love you?
His kindness to you and his care for you in life are actually just his means to please a woman. If a man really loves someone, he will give her a sense of security and warm love in spirit. He will also love his mother and respect your choice. However, he can't do it. He just stole your heart by some means, and he probably didn't give his heart.
Don't rush to get pregnant, and don't rush to get married at this time. Instead, we should give each other some time to review our hearts and each other again. When you are not sure whether this person loves you, don't hurry to marry him. And you should also listen to your mother's opinion. The onlooker is clear. She may see more thoroughly than you. If your boyfriend is unwilling to support your mother with you, it is better not to marry him. If he is unwilling to support your mother, he should not accept this house. Because he can never understand how important your mother is to you.
Article Source（ Summer MO's Blog ）
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