Wen | Wei Zhizhong, Fu Wenting
The epidemic period is a special period of time, which is different from calling friends in the past. We must fight the epidemic at home and tide over difficulties together. During this period, we launched a pure online social model, which is a challenge, but also an opportunity! Therefore, we can take the opportunity to review and clean up our own circle of friends. Some relationships can be broken when we make a decision, abandoned when we give up, and abandoned when we leave! Psychology believes that interpersonal relationship is a direct psychological connection established by people in communication. It is a general term for interpersonal communication relationships, mainly including kinship, friend relationship, classmate relationship, teacher-student relationship, employment relationship, comrade in arms relationship, colleague relationship, and the relationship between leader and led. As shown in the figure below, everyone is not an island. Breaking away means not to remove all interpersonal relationships, but to repair their interpersonal relationships like a gardener pruning a garden.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
Characteristics of interpersonal communication under epidemic situation
Online communication as the main form
In the context of the epidemic, in addition to face-to-face interpersonal communication with family members, people who stay at home to fight the epidemic can only move interpersonal communication online.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
Diaoyin, WeChat, Today's Headlines, Weibo, Zhihu, QQ , douban, taobao, even kitchen and other online social platforms have become a platform for people to establish contact.
Anonymity and anomie of online interpersonal communication
Online interpersonal communication has many characteristics, but under the pressure of the current serious epidemic, in the community or village where closed control has been implemented for a long time, there are also arguments between villagers and grassroots cadres in WeChat groups, which reflects the anonymity and anomie characteristics of online communication.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
Due to the anonymity of online social networking, people's comments face less pressure from being evaluated and responsible, so their published information is more likely to be out of order. For example, the spread of rumors during the epidemic has a certain relationship with the online social disorder of people.
Necessity of upgrading contacts under the epidemic situation
Form a growing network
There is a famous saying about high quality interpersonal communication in Di Zi Gui as follows: "When you hear anger, you will hear good news. When you hear bad news, you will find good friends. When you hear fear, you will hear joy, you will understand people, and you will become more and more intimate." Honesty is bad for your behavior. If you want to grow, you should learn to "obey", maintain clear and independent judgment, and make more friends who are outspoken.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
If we can upgrade our network, get to know the high-end talents in the field, increase our experience and broaden our horizon in the interaction during the epidemic, then we can improve our own shortcomings, and get a good growth in specific expertise and capabilities.
When a group of talents with high learning ability gather together, a growing network can be formed virtually. The most ideal growth network is like Chairman Mao's learning circle during his study in the First Normal University.
During the epidemic, it is an opportunity for people to upgrade
The rampant virus makes us The "foot ban" at home, on the surface, is a delay for us to maintain and expand effective contacts; In essence, however, this epidemic is a good opportunity for us to repair our own circle.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
If we change our thinking, this adversity will become an opportunity for us to overtake at corners, and a good opportunity for us to fully reorganize and allocate human resources.
How to break off interpersonal communication under the epidemic situation
Enjoy solitude and end the relationship between wine and meat
During the epidemic period, people lived at home for as short as half a month and many months. This different way of celebrating the Spring Festival has made many people who are used to getting together with friends in the Spring Festival become lonely, empty and cold, and anxious.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
After staying at home for a long time, you will actually find that you are not very important to those fair weather friends. They are not worried because they lack you. So, maybe we should focus on getting along with ourselves, and slowly, from accepting solitude to enjoying solitude, if we continue like this, maybe we can achieve The supreme state of this personal style of "prudent solitude".
(Image source: Vision China official website)
The life and death test of the epidemic has exposed the vulnerability of the old people in the relationship between wine and meat. It is more important to understand what they really want than to engage in entertainment. Compared with meaningless social interaction, it is obviously more important to understand themselves.
Reviewing and restructuring, when losing invalid contacts
Resumption originally belongs to economic vocabulary, and is now widely used in all aspects of life. Interpersonal resumption is also a kind of resumption.
(Image source: Vision China official website)
The specific steps of interpersonal review are as follows:
The first step is to review the process: Review your previous self positioning, communication standards and expectations in interpersonal communication.
The second step is to evaluate the effect: recall your interpersonal communication in the past, whether it is different from your ideal result? In what aspects (such as professional learning, personality improvement, dealing with people, etc.) have you grown significantly? What else needs to be improved? Find out what you are most interested in and good at, and you can strengthen your practice in the future.
The third step is to analyze the reasons: in-depth analysis is needed to find the root cause of the failure to reach the ideal interpersonal state. If this reason can be analyzed and implemented in the future interpersonal communication, there will be significant progress.
Step 4: Summarize experience: through previous analysis, you can communicate with your family members and let them point out their shortcomings in interpersonal communication + Suggestions, combining the gap between the current situation and expectations, write out specific suggestions for improving interpersonal communication.
People's energy is limited, so they must spend their only energy on cutting edge, gradually give up invalid contacts, gradually make subtraction, and make minimalism one of their communication styles.
First, subtract from the wardrobe; Then socialize from mobile phone app Subtraction, delete those "zombie" friends, or forget friends in the Jianghu; Finally, subtract in your heart, release your regret and burden, clear up the past, and walk the rest of your life easily.
Those who seek the same path should stay away from the impetuous voice
Just the so-called "The same voice is good for corresponding, and the same qi is self seeking", "the person who is a bosom friend dies", "the person who is close to the ink is red, and the person who is close to the ink is black" all say that "it is enough to have a bosom friend in life".
(Image source: Vision China official website)
The impetuous voice under the epidemic situation has two meanings.
First of all, on various social platforms during the epidemic, the information related to the epidemic was overwhelming, authoritative, authentic, and also fabricated. For some meaningless and unconfirmed information spread in the circle of friends, we should automatically stay away from and block it, and at the same time, we should maintain a clear identification ability to avoid becoming a part of the spread of rumors.
Secondly, if you have been doing anti epidemic related self-protection, voluntary service, hard core science popularization and other related work in accordance with scientific and standardized procedures during the epidemic, or cultivating yourself at home to make solid self-improvement. You may also encounter people who do not understand your pursuit and feelings, or even ridicule you "Friend", when encountering these negative comments, your heart may become impetuous.
At this time, we need to be clear about our inner needs, stay away from the impetuous voice of online propaganda and mutual hatred, concentrate on learning from the industry leaders, use the precious charging time, let ourselves continue to grow into a world-class presence in the industry, and invisibly attract high-quality gentlemen to meet. If you are in full bloom, butterflies will come!
(Image source: Vision China official website)
During the epidemic, let's tidy up our inner baggage. When we are ready, we will be ready. When we leave, we will be ready. When you walk on the road again, you will walk much lighter.
