(2019-01-26 23:28)
label:
Miscellaneous talk
|
|
I wanted to do an experiment in the morning, but later I had breakfast, washed and dried, and opened PS.
A day of painting has just passed.
Night Dr S and Ph D. G asked me to eat sushi together before he went downstairs.
To be honest, I don't have time to paint now. Can I paint two or three times a year? But every picture can make visible progress, and I have to get a little sense of achievement from it... I hope I can have more time in the future, although it is not realistic.
Smear casually
(2018-12-31 20:31)
label:
Miscellaneous talk
|
|
The last day of 2018.
Finally, I didn't wake up at four or five o'clock, but slept until 10 o'clock.
After dinner, I watched the cartoon Dormitory O with Li Yuanfang. It was a real sand sculpture. I don't know why Li Yuanfang was more absorbed than I was.
To sum up, life will not be mentioned and we will live hard.
In the first year of work, I got about 800000 RMB worth of scientific research projects at the national, provincial and municipal levels. Although not much money, it is better than nothing. I have met many academician level and famous foreign scientific research institutions' great scientists, which has broadened my horizon and improved my ideological level. I am most grateful to my relatives and friends who have supported and helped me in the past year. Unfortunately, Paper is not available yet.
In addition, I went to the cinema to see two films, drew two pictures (see the following illustration), went to two diffuse exhibitions and related activities in the year, met the excellent young voice actor Peng Yao, and established a pure interpersonal relationship with the little sisters of the school's house dance troupe and folk music troupe... Although it conflicts with the working hours, it is still full of regret, But it is still substantial.
A year of wandering back and forth in these two strange cities has made me decisive, bold and sharp. Thank you for your life. In the new year, I hope I can become more decisive and bold, instead of being sharp, it is better to be profound
So, 2018, bye~
ht
(2018-09-22 22:57)
label:
Miscellaneous talk
|
|
I sorted out the past and found that all my real happiness had ended in 2014.
After that, I became another person who I hated and even feared.
Recently, because I had to prepare for the defense, I lived alone in the three rooms and one hall of the 100 square meters, and resumed my single time. Very happy.
Go to bed on time and get up on time every day, spend half an hour cooking breakfast for yourself, go to the office after eating, go to the canteen at noon to eat, in the afternoon you can also be lazy to see Qingyunzhi, and then go back to cook dinner at night. I lived a leisurely and comfortable life, just like I did two years ago. In addition to no painting, no cos, no recording studio, no cat. I feel satisfied and satisfied with the state that I don't even have a cat.
When I am alone, I am in a calm mood. I should pay attention to eating, drinking and wearing. I can also comb my hair to be soft and obedient, and I am in good mental state. When I am with my so-called family members, I tend to be fickle and angry, and eat and drink casually, unkempt, and wear untidy clothes. Every day, I live in the inner voice of "Ah, this boring day will soon pass".
That's not home.
It was just the residence of an adult man, an old man and a young child, not my home.
And once I stayed in that environment, I was very tired.
My mother knows me best: "You are used to being alone."
Now she is vacationing on the beach in Hawaii with her friends.
After more than a year's delay, the so-called defense is finally coming.
Look at the status of friends on the trumpet. It's totally different from that on the tuba.
Recently, many children have a holiday, including college entrance examination and graduation. This month, I graduated from high school and college.
They are really young.
Looking back, I have graduated from college for eight years.
How many eight years can one have in life.
Walking on the corridor, I saw a younger brother of the post-90s generation with a fresh hair style and white skin chatting up with me. When he asked me where I was from, I replied with a smile that he was from Bosi. Looking back on my busy days recently, I often talked with younger students at all levels. They always asked me what I studied. I always said in an old man's voice that I was a Bosi, and they would be surprised.
I can only be proud of my hairstyle, clothes and facial expressions.
My heart has aged beyond redemption.
It has become my daily routine to try to stay in the environment of young people and try to slow down my aging.
However, when I go back at night, I take off my clothes, wipe off my makeup, pull up my hair, look at the sallow and haggard face with gradually lost elasticity, and look at the increasingly out of shape body, I often feel sad.
My life has been like this.
Now I am a typical negative energy burst meter. I have become the kind of person I hate most.
Everyone who heard about it made progress in all aspects and got the news of success.
Just me.
I failed so.
I like to see people who have traveled a lot, have a lot of knowledge, and enjoy the different hair styles.
Today, sitting under a hundred year old tree in a secluded mountain, I tasted the newly picked green tea with a hand made porcelain cup; Tomorrow, on the gorgeous stage, we will wave light long sleeves and play colorful and sweet silks and bamboos... This is true of the teacher who has the title of professor as a national first-class actor.
Today, I sweat in the advanced training room full of talents, and practice my dance moves with great effort, showing you the most beautiful body posture; Tomorrow, I will teach and educate people, and teach my students what I have learned conscientiously... My dear cousin is like this.
Today, in the spacious and bright office, facing the shining computer screen, I meticulously sort out reports and data; Tomorrow, I will dress up and take the most beautiful role-playing photos in the park with beautiful scenery, pavilions and pavilions... This is the case with many playmates in the past.
Today, I am in a hurry at the work site with complicated affairs to supervise the progress of the project; Tomorrow, we will have a hot spring, or the evening wind blowing at the seaside, watching the bright moon and few stars, clouds and birds flying away... This is true of many students.
Today, I read a novel and was attracted by the plot and character settings. After reviewing one or two stories, I will write amazing paintings tomorrow This was true of many playmates in the past.
Today, I read a blog at the National University of Singapore; An international conference will be held tomorrow in Berlin, Germany
It's not hurting spring. I just don't think there's anything to do.
I feel that nothing is meaningful.
You can't have fun doing anything.
I tried to stroll around the commercial street, looking at the dazzling passers-by A, B and C in the busy past. The loneliness in my heart gradually rose, and finally I returned depressed.
Try to see the flowers. All kinds of flowers have bloomed in Dongjiu, Yuanhu and Nandaemun. The little girls who are dressed in colorful clothes have taken pictures of themselves, flowers, being photographed, and others. The same thing is that everyone has a bright smile on their faces, and they have a radiant light on their bodies, which makes me unable to get close.
Loneliness is different from loneliness.
Loneliness means that you have nothing to think about, and all your thoughts are lost, while loneliness still has expectations.
I am not lonely.
By chance, I turned to my favorite radio play and found that there were new episodes.
Suddenly, my mind was dragged back to the same year.
The day when I listen to the drama and painting with Mulan cat in the dormitory alone.
I want to draw something again, but I find Too long, too long, no painting 。
The long lost digital board, The computer has been formatted countless times 。
And Maomi Mulan disappeared.
Every day, I just hope that time flies. I have forgotten why I am happy.
Spring is warm this year, and the spring scenery has spread thousands of miles away.
Botanical Garden? Where else would you like to see it with others?
Magnolias have been in full bloom.
Huachao Festival? Where else would you like to participate?
Jianghan Road and the marsh are full of memories, but it's even more desolate when I think of it now.
I am no longer me.
