106 tips for cultivating contacts

informal essay four thousand one hundred and thirty-one 13 years ago (2010-12-19)

On the road to success, People More important than knowledge. Developing relationships should be your top priority. Never Eat Alone introduces the rules of communication in the 21st century. The book includes many practical skills to make you thrive through interpersonal relationships.

To preserve the essence, here are 106 tips summarized from the book. Practice these skills in practice and become life A successful and substantial communication master.

1. Helping others succeed

The essence of social interaction is to help others succeed in various forms. Share your knowledge and resources, time and energy, friends and relationships, compassion and care, so as to continuously provide value for others and improve your own value.

2. Try to make yourself pay more than return

Because you will provide value to others, others will contact you. So think more about others than yourself.

3. Do not keep

Don't think that friendship is limited. This is investment, which will roll more and more.

4. The key to success is generosity

It is not for convenience, but generosity that prevails in social intercourse.  

5. Clarify your life goals

The intersection of your talents and desires is your inner passion. What is your most exciting thing? What do you think time flies?

6. Know exactly what you want

The more you know what you want, the more you can find a way to achieve it.

7. Get used to setting goals for yourself

The easiest way to make a difference is to set goals. Turn dreams into life goals, and then decompose them into small goals.

8. Set a plan for developing relationships

There is a process to build a social network. Your plan should include the following three points:

1. Your three-year goal and progress every three months.

2. List the people who can help you achieve each goal.

3. How to contact the person listed in point 2.

Once you set a goal, post it where you often see it.

9. Create your own "think tank"

Find people who are willing to help you. They are your "think tank"

10. Build your network before you need it

Keep in touch as soon as possible before you find that you need someone else. The important thing is to treat these people as friends, not potential customers.

11. Keep in touch with people you know

At first, focus on the people in your current network.

12. Bold

Courage is amazing. The development of two people with similar talents is different, perhaps only because of the thickness of their skins.

13. Willing to ask for help from others

Being willing to take can create opportunities. You should be willing to ask others for what you want, just as you are willing to help others. Remember, prepare for the worst when others say "no".

14. Consider gains in the face of fear

If you have the cheek to talk to someone you don't know, you will naturally be afraid of the dilemma that you can fail. This is a risky thing. If you want to achieve something, you must take risks. And nothing but mediocrity.

15. Respect others

Respect everyone, regardless of high or low.

16、 transparent  

An open mind is a useful and very popular attitude.

17. Make friends

People who are good at communication are not "building networks", but "making friends". Extensive harvest is a natural result, not a well-designed goal

18. Get ready

Who do you want to see? How to meet? What did he think of you after seeing you? These cannot be ignored.

19. Know the people you associate with

How can you have enough people who know you well enough to go deep into his field and have a professional conversation with him. You can easily be appreciated. Find a rich and deep common ground, and then you will be able to communicate easily and leave a deep impression.

20. Learn about other people's interests

Love me, and you will soon become a part of their life.

21. Never eat alone

It is very easy to communicate easily when eating. Eating with others is an effective way to communicate.

22. Manage your information

Effective information management is very important. If you are organized, focused and persistent, no one will leave your network.

23. List

Sort out your list according to your goals (such as potential customers, potential employers, etc.). List not only the relevant units, but also the people who have the right to speak in the unit.

24. Know the authority in your professional field

To achieve your goals, you need to know who is the best in your field. List the authorities in the current field.

25. List the people you already know

List the people you already know: relatives, college classmates, former classmates, former teachers, former colleagues

26. Flexible organization information

You should be flexible in the way you manage lists. By location, industry and closeness

27. Use others' contact list to supplement your own

Others' lists are your resources.

28. Establish a list of "people eager to know"

The classification of your list can include "people who are eager to know". They are high-level people, and you hope to know them in the future.

29. Contact a complete stranger (Cold Call)

When you need to call strangers, you are more or less afraid. Just harden your scalp. Just think that you will succeed. Meeting a new person is both a challenge and an opportunity

30. Persistence

If you contact others, they don't respond. You should continue to contact them. You should take the initiative. Even aggressive.

31. Contact the indirectly related person (Warm Call)

Use the following four rules

1. Expression reliability: mention the relevant person or unit.

2. Value proposition: What can you do for them?

3. Urgency and convenience: In most cases, the only purpose of calling unexpectedly is to make an appointment.

4. Prepare a compromise plan: position higher at the beginning and leave room for discussion.

32. Think of the guard as an ally rather than an enemy

The guard should also be respected. Don't annoy them.

33. Never disappear

When building social networks, remember: first, never disappear. Disappearance is worse than failure.

34. Try to stay visible and active

Fill your social, meeting, and event schedules. You have to be visible and active in your budding friends and networks.

35. Arrange many things together

You have to work hard to connect with others successfully, but that doesn't mean you have to spend a lot of time. The same event can be scheduled to save time. For example, invite all the people you want to meet together.

36. Have fun

Communication is fun, not a waste of time

37. Share your passion

Sharing interests is the foundation of any relationship. When you are really interested in something, it is very contagious

38. Emphasis on time quality

Friendship is based on the quality of time spent by both parties, not the quantity.

39. Follow up or failure

After meeting the person you want to meet, let others remember you. Follow up is key.

40. Follow up immediately

You should follow up within 12 to 24 hours after meeting them. E-mail is a shortcut.

41. Don't forget to follow up again

One month later, send another email. keep in contact.

42. Spend time communicating with people at the meeting

Meetings are often misunderstood as places to look for ideas. wrong! Meetings have only one advantage: they provide a place to meet like-minded people.

43. Be the meeting organizer

Don't just be a participant; Be the organizer. Prepare information in advance: who, how and where to meet.

44. Public speaking

Speaking is one of the easiest and most effective ways to let others remember you

45. Follow up as much as possible

Don't spend the whole meeting with your best friend. Follow up as many people as possible.

46. Keep in touch with social experts

There are many more people than we know. These people are the core of each network. If you can make friends with these people. You only need to contact thousands of people through this person.

47. Have as many acquaintances as possible

(aquaintance=people who know but are not particularly close)

Usually the most important people in our network are the acquaintances. Why? Because our closest friends are similar to what we know. So the more people you know, the stronger you will be

48. Meet people in all fields

We not only know thousands of people, but also thousands of people in different fields.

49. Exchange contacts with others

The most effective way to expand your circle of friends is to connect your circle with others' circle.

50. Establish your organizational committee

Politicians have "organizing committees": organizing people working in various fields together. If you want to have more extensive contact with the world, you should find a key person to be your "organizing member"

51. Improve your "language fluency"

"Language fluency": the ability to communicate confidently with anyone and under any circumstances. This is a common feature of many successful people. The ability to live in harmony with others is more important for personal progress than anything else.

52. Be true to yourself

To be impressive, being different is the key. To be different, you must be true to yourself. To be yourself is attractive. Your uniqueness is your strength

53. "Compliance"

The power of obedience is ignored by many people. Obedience plays an important role in small talk.

54. Tell the truth

When you understand that the best way to break the silence is to speak from the heart, it is not so terrible to start a conversation again.

55. Learn to use nonverbal communication

When others see you, they can subconsciously decide whether they will like you in 10 seconds. Such judgment is based on verbal communication.

56. Materials to be discussed

Prepare something to talk about. Pay attention to current events and cultivate some hobbies.

57. Learn to listen

You must understand others before you can be understood.

58. Remember other people's names

Nothing sounds more comfortable than your own name.

59. Sincerity

There is no doubt that if you want to be regarded as a special person by others, you should make others feel that he is special in your eyes.

60. Try to find out the motivation of others

When you first communicate with others, you can find their motivation. Their motivation is generally based on three types: making money and finding love Change the world.

61. Help others realize their deep aspirations

Taking the initiative to help others solve their key problems can make them very close.

62. Make yourself indispensable to others

Indispensability is very important. If you want to be indispensable, you need to constantly put your own information Sociology Relationships and goodwill are communicated to as many people as possible

63. Think about how you can make everyone around you succeed

When someone tells you that he has some problems, you should think about what you can do. The solution comes from your experience, your knowledge, your friends and your helpers

64. Offer help

Don't wait for others to ask for help, take the initiative.

65. Dissemination of knowledge

When you don't have many financial and social contacts, it is also feasible to make profits through social networking. This is through knowledge. You can easily learn to spread knowledge in your network.

66. Interested in the success of others

If you are interested in the success of others, you can become more successful within 2 months. You can also spend 2 years to make others interested in your success. (Dale Carnegie)

67. Occasional small contacts

80% of relationships are only maintained through small contacts. You should keep in touch, keep in touch, keep in touch. You should constantly feed your network to ensure that it will not wither.

68. Repeat, repeat

There is a very critical way to get others to remember you well: repetition

69. Establish a scoring system

Establishing a scoring system can make it easier for you to maintain your relationship. For example:

1. "Level 1″ Contact at least once a month.

2. "Level 2″ At least make a phone call or send an email every quarter.

3. "Level 3″ Contact at least once a year.

70. Include small contacts in your agenda

You need to include small contacts in your work scope.

71. In the name of an individual

Try your best to keep all information in your personal name if possible.

72. Don't forget your birthday

Birthdays should be your best chance to get in touch.

73. Eat with the "main force"

We have established relationships with older, wiser and more experienced people. These people are the "main force". Have dinner with them and recharge your batteries at the same time.

74. Be an interesting person

In fact, everyone you meet will ask themselves a question similar to this: "Do I need to spend an hour having lunch with this person?"

75. Be a person with content

Content is the professionalism of knowledge. It's your difference. A place where you have a unique brand. So we should have our own unique opinions.

76. Keep learning and sharing your content without reservation

To be different from others, you should learn, share and sell your content without mercy.

77. Get others' content

Sometimes you can easily turn others' ideas into your own. Then share and apply these ideas in a leading way.

78. Provide your own content

Other times, you have to think about providing your own content. You need to know all kinds of information, and then connect them differently.

79. Attention

Once it resonates, it will attract attention. What you have to offer is very simple: a vivid story.

80. Become an expert

The most common way to become a content creator is to be an expert. Do what experts do: teach, write and tell others your professional knowledge.

81. Teach what you want to learn

Teaching others is the best way for you to learn and understand.

82. Use stories to express your content

Powerful content expressed in the form of stories can help achieve goals. When you tell a story, use your feelings to convince those doubters

83. Establish personal brand

A strong brand is very competitive, but it is always based on the value of the product rather than the way it is described. A good personal brand can do three things: make others feel authentic, distinctive and trustworthy.

84. Make yourself unique

Your brand expresses what you can offer, why you are special, and why they keep in touch with you.

85. Increasing value

To become a brand, you need to focus on what you do and constantly add value. This means you need to go beyond.

86. Sign of establishing personal brand

What do you want others to think when they hear and read your name? Your brand logo should include all the words that people will use when referring to you.

87. Package your brand

To look valuable, you need to look bright and professional. So why not build a personal website?

88. Promote your brand

If you don't promote yourself, no one else will. Your success depends on how others recognize your work, which also depends on the quality of your work

89. Keep in touch with the media

You should keep in touch with the media from now on, instead of going to them when you really want to tell them a story.

90. Try to promote the information content, not the author

What you promote to people should be your sense of mission, not your pride.

91. Co writing

If your writing skills are poor, you can write with others. By writing together in this way, you can make your interpersonal network grow exponentially with people you didn't connect with before.

92. Writing articles

Writing articles can greatly promote your career development. Let you be noticed in a short time.

93. Persist in writing to become a good writer

To be a good writer: "Write, write again. When you're done, keep writing "

94. Association with celebrities

You only keep in touch with nobody? You need to focus on some important people, which will make a big difference to your life and that of your friends around you.

95. Trust building

Trust is the key to getting close to these authorities. There is no ulterior motive for people to trust you to contact them. Let others trust you and treat them as ordinary people rather than stars

96. Participating in associations

Now there are various associations. If you want to face the influential people, you have to be a participant first.

97. Establish your own club

Sometimes you have to join some valuable clubs, but you can't join them for various reasons. Why not set up your own club? Draw up your own promotion plan and establish a new organization. Invite people you want to meet to join your organization.

98. Modesty

Arrogance is a kind of disease. It will make you forget your true friends and the importance of friends. Keep modest as you progress. Help others to progress with you, or even surpass you.

99. Review your past

Review your past frequently and keep in touch with those who have been important to you since childhood

100. Find some tutors

Find mentors who are talented, experienced, and willing to invest time to help you improve. It is not just based on salary and reputation to determine your career development direction.

101. Take the advantages of all families

There must be my teacher in a three person trip. There are many people around you who can learn.

102. Establish a good master apprentice relationship

Successful mentoring requires effectiveness and enthusiasm. The effect means that you can let the teacher see his influence on you. Passion means that your mentor will be committed to your progress.

103. Find some disciples

When you are constantly striving to make progress, you must go back and help others. You will learn a lot from your students.

104. Adhere to principles

Communication should be forward development, not backward compromise. Never go against your own values when dealing with others.

105. Don't try to balance your professional and personal life

You should provide the same value to people in different customs. Instead of dividing life into work and life.

106. Create close friendship

How many people can walk into your house and open the refrigerator to find food? Having close friends will make you happy.