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Pop Culture

Legendary organist Garth Hudson, 85, makes his first performance ‘in years’ at a low-key show

The backbone of The Band may be frail, but he still stunned the crowd with his soulful playing.

the band, garth hudson, bob dylan
via Heinrich Klaffs/WikimediaCommons

Garth Hudson performing with The Band. Hamburg, May 1971.

Garth Hudson, 85, made a name for himself being a quiet presence in a raucous band ... The Band, that is. Hudson played organ, accordion, and the occasional saxophone in an outfit initially known as The Hawks, which became known as The Band after backing Bob Dylan in the mid-'60s when he controversially went electric.

The Band would also back Dylan on his famous “Basement Tapes” sessions in 1967 that were eventually released in 1975.

After being introduced to the world through Dylan, The Band made a name for itself as one of the most talented ensembles in rock history, recording classic songs including "The Weight," “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down," and "Up on Cripple Creek."

Hudson changed rock history by being one of the first few to play a Hammond organ on stage. He was known as the “mad scientist” in the band who joined only if he could give music lessons to fellow members Levon Helm, Rick Danko, Richard Manuel and Robbie Robertson.

Hudson also composed music that appeared in Martin Scorsese's masterpieces “Raging Bull” and “The King of Comedy.”

Today, Hudson lives in an assisted living facility, and recently fans started an online campaign to show appreciation by sending him cards. But even though Hudson is in the last chapter of his life, he recently revealed that he’s far from finished. On Sunday, April 16, he surprised the rock world by performing at a house show hosted by musician Sarah Perrotta in Kingston, New York.

He performed Duke Ellington’s “Sophisticated Lady” on piano during the show. The footage shows that although Hudson is frail, the music in him is still as strong as ever.

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Education

Youth interest in STEM peaks around age 11. UScellular wants to change that.

Kids are losing interest in STEM subjects between ages 11 and 15. Here's what that means for future innovation.

Photo courtesy of UScellular

Kids on a field trip learn from Sania Naseem, Senior RF Planning Engineer at UScellular.

Imagine being a 12-year-old girl in a small town who’s interested in computers. You’ve learned a bit of programming online, but you don’t know anyone who works in the tech field and your school district doesn’t have the kinds of classes you need to explore further.

How likely would you be to keep and pursue that interest?

Since the internet changed everyone’s lives in the 1990s, there’s been a push for Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics (STEM) education. Universal reliance on technology has made STEM careers not just desirable but vital, and the speed at which those fields are moving means we need young people to stay interested in them.

Research indicates that we’ve largely succeeded in reaching kids when they’re young—children demonstrate a deep fascination with STEM subjects up to age 11. But something shifts during adolescence. Past age 11, interest in STEM starts to wane, often dissipating by age 15.

The question is why.

To get to the bottom of this STEM age/interest gap mystery, wireless carrier UScellular partnered with developmental psychologist and researcher Richard Rende, Ph.D. Through a state-of-the-art analysis of the research , Dr. Rende helped uncover the barriers that prevent youth—particularly girls and those living in rural communities—from maintaining and nurturing their interest in STEM.

kids walking with an adult guide near a school bus Students taking a STEM field trip Photo courtesy of UScellular

Dr. Rende found that keeping kids from losing STEM interest as they become teens requires programs that are equitable , relatable , relevant and supportive .

Here’s what those four drivers look like in practice:

Equitable

- Bringing STEM programs to rural areas that don’t have access to advanced courses or school-based curriculum
- Countering the notion that STEM isn’t for everyone and offering buffers for when kids are confronted with stereotypes or biases

Relatable

- Exposing girls to women in STEM professions who share similar backgrounds in smaller and rural communities
- Having STEM professionals share their experiences growing up so youth don’t see them as “superheroes” doing something unattainable

Relevant

- Programs and field trips that demonstrate how STEM is applied, especially in ways that connect to the local environment or technology kids already use
- Incorporating kids’ voices to help guide the elements of a program

Supportive

- Provide supportive mentorship, especially when projects become more complicated and require emotion regulation and resilience
- Teach cognitive skills that will help kids believe they have the capacity to succeed in STEM subjects

kids on a STEM field trip Kids learning about cell towers from Cheryl Dennard, Senior Manager of Core Services Engineering at UScellular Photo courtesy of UScellular

To test out his findings before sharing them with the world, Dr. Rende worked with UScellular’s non-profit partner, YWCA, which has an after-school and summer program called TechGYRLS, designed to inspire girls in grades 3 to 8 to consider future careers in STEM fields. Together they created a refreshed STEM program guide incorporating Dr. Rende’s research and worked with focus groups at various YWCA locations to get feedback.

“What we see to date is that programming and mentoring to ‘train’ kids to be STEM people is not always enough to sustain and encourage interest during the transition to adolescence, especially for underserved youth,” says Dr. Rende. “We need to help them see the opportunities in STEM that spark their curiosity and gain belief that they can confidently explore all the possibilities available to them in STEM, including those that go beyond the traditional STEM careers like mathematician or scientist. It could be a vet, a nurse, wireless network engineer, arborist, audio engineer, turf scientist, or mechanical engineer and may not be a career that requires years and years of higher education.”

After-school enrichment programs like YWCA’s TechGYRLS can be found in communities all over the country, and parents, guardians and teachers can help the kids in their communities by identifying similar programs and encouraging them to participate. If teachers or youth-focused non-profits want to create their own STEM program, Dr. Rende’s whitepaper can help inform their approach and design to keep kids interested.

UScellular and YWCA are working on a digital version of the program guide to increase access for even more youth and help educators improve their STEM programming. Longer term, the perceptions and attitudes of the TechGYRLS participants will be measured to evaluate if the current decline in STEM interest is being reduced or averted. Advancing innovation requires people who pursue careers in STEM fields, so the more interest we can spark and sustain in young people, the brighter our future will look.

Learn more about how UScellular is supporting STEM education here .
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Business

This Map Reveals The True Value Of $100 In Each State

Your purchasing power can swing by 30% from state to state.

Image by Tax Foundation .

Map represents the value of 100 dollars.


As the cost of living in large cities continues to rise , more and more people are realizing that the value of a dollar in the United States is a very relative concept. For decades, cost of living indices have sought to address and benchmark the inconsistencies in what money will buy, but they are often so specific as to prevent a holistic picture or the ability to "browse" the data based on geographic location.

The Tax Foundation addressed many of these shortcomings using the most recent (2015) Bureau of Economic Analysis data to provide a familiar map of the United States overlaid with the relative value of what $100 is "worth" in each state. Granted, going state-by-state still introduces a fair amount of "smoothing" into the process — $100 will go farther in Los Angeles than in Fresno, for instance — but it does provide insight into where the value lies.

The map may not subvert one's intuitive assumptions, but it nonetheless quantities and presents the cost of living by geography in a brilliantly simple way. For instance, if you're looking for a beach lifestyle but don't want to pay California prices, try Florida, which is about as close to "average" — in terms of purchasing power, anyway — as any state in the Union. If you happen to find yourself in a "Brewster's Millions"-type situation, head to Hawaii, D.C., or New York. You'll burn through your money in no time.

income, money, economics, national average

The Relative Value of $100 in a state.

Image by Tax Foundation .

If you're quite fond of your cash and would prefer to keep it, get to Mississippi, which boasts a 16.1% premium on your cash from the national average.

The Tax Foundation notes that if you're using this map for a practical purpose, bear in mind that incomes also tend to rise in similar fashion, so one could safely assume that wages in these states are roughly inverse to the purchasing power $100 represents.


This article originally appeared on 08.17.17

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Family

School is back in session. Here are 5 simple lunch ideas to keep you sane while you keep your family healthy.

With O Organics, it's easy.

Photo credit: Canva

Yes, school lunches CAN be easy, healthy and inexpensive.

Parents, let’s face it: prepping school lunches can feel like trying to solve a complex math equation. It's got to be nutritious, appealing, fast , and let's not forget…within budget. But what if we told you there’s a secret weapon that can make this whole ordeal a breeze? Enter: O Organics from Albertsons.

O Organics offers a wide range of affordable, USDA organic goodies that are perfect for school lunches. From crunchy apple slices to delicious, creamy greek yogurt, they've got you covered. Plus, their prices won’t break the bank, proving that healthy eating doesn’t have to be a luxury.

Now, let’s get down to the good stuff: the food! Here are some simple, kid (and wallet) friendly lunch ideas—made entirely with O Organics ingredients—to help you ditch the processed junk and give your kids the fuel they need to conquer the classroom:

1. Pasta Salad

  • Main: A cold pasta salad made with O Organics whole-grain rotini pasta, O Organics chopped vegetables (like cucumbers, bell peppers, and cherry tomatoes), and Italian dressing. Add protein with chickpeas or a three bean blend.
  • Side: O Organics apple slices.
  • Snack: A serving of O Organics Greek yogurt, with some granola for a fun topping.

2. Egg Salad Sandwich

  • Main: A sandwich using whole wheat bread filled with a mixture of O Organics hard boiled eggs, mayo (or Greek yogurt for extra protein), mustard, dill, onion powder, salt and pepper.
  • Side: O Organics tortilla chips and salsa.
  • Snack: A pack of O Organics fruit strips.

3. Peanut Butter Apple Wrap (great for toddlers)

  • Main: O Organics peanut butter spread on a couple of flour soft taco tortillas, topped with thinly sliced apples. Drizzle some O Organics honey, roll it up and voila!
  • Side: O Organics baby-cut carrots with a side of hummus.
  • Snack: O Organics cottage cheese.

4. Quickie Quesadilla

  • Main: A tortilla filled with O Organics Mexican Style Shredded Cheese, black beans, and a sprinkle of chili powder.
  • Side: A couple of hard boiled O Organics eggs.
  • Snack: Ants on a log.

5. A Hot Dog…that stays hot

  • Main: You know the drill. Hot dog (we recommended the O Organics Beef Franks). Mustard. Cheese. Bun.
  • Side: A colorful side salad with spring mix, cherry tomatoes, and vinaigrette dressing.
  • Snack: O Organics banana chips.

But how the heck do you keep the hot dog hot ? We’ve got just the tip, courtesy of Allrecipes.com :

Step 1

  • Preheat an insulated beverage container by filling it with boiling water. Let stand for 15 to 20 minutes. Right before leaving, dump out water and replace with more boiling water. The preheating keeps it hot for a longer time. Place the hot dog into the water and close the lid.

Step 2

  • When your child is ready for lunch, they can take the hot dog out of the container and place it on the bun.

Remember: This list is just a starting point. You can totally customize it to your kid’s needs and preferences. You can even involve your kiddos in the lunch-packing process to make it more fun for everyone. Let them help choose the menu, make a shopping list, pack their lunches…even grow their own veggies! If you’re feeling ambitious, that is.

No matter how you choose to give your kids the best possible start to their day, making small changes and taking advantage of resources like O Organics can help make it happen in a sustainable and enjoyable way.

So, what are you waiting for? Shop O Organics now exclusively at Albertsons, Safeway or any sister store. Your kids' bodies (and taste buds) will thank you.

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Modern Families

Men are asked what secrets they keep from their spouses, and the answers are surprising

A rare glimpse of what actually gets bottled up inside.

Photo by Donovan Grabowski on Unsplash
two men smiling near trees

Men sometimes get labeled as the gender more likely to keep secrets for selfish, manipulative purposes. But just as often, men might keep certain things to themselves due to the effects of gender norms : wanting to hide insecurities to appear strong for their families, hoping to shield their partners from hurt, not feeling safe to show emotion, and so on.

Reddit user Teen_dream91 recently asked : “What, if anything, are you unable or unwilling to share fully openly and honestly about yourself with your spouse ?” and the answers are a prime example of this.

These long kept secrets—some hilarious, others heartbreaking—a rare candid glimpse into exactly what many men feel compelled to keep bottled up inside.

Check them out below:

“I keep the ceiling fan on at night because she farts in her sleep and it's so bad it wakes me up.” JackassWhisperer

"When I go grocery shopping, i often buy a fresh rotisserie chicken thigh for myself, and wolf it down on a parkbench on my way home like a homeless caveman. I have no idea why, but it's my little me-time ritual." - Sternsson

"My self-doubt is something I conceal. I strive to be her rock and revealing my vulnerabilities seems counterproductive." - A dhesivenessGlass978

"When she asks to go out with her girlfriends or away on an overnight with some friends, she thinks I’m upset I’m not included. In reality, I’m praising the lord for a day or two alone." Bobo_Baggins03x

men's health

A man sitting on the couch, alone.

Photo credit: Canva

"While I love my spouse deeply, I struggle to fully share my childhood traumas. The memories are painful and sometimes I feel like shielding her from that darkness." Slight_Policy3133

"My child (18 months) is legitimately well behaved, compliant, and enjoyable to be around when she’s not in the home and it’s just he and I. When she’s around he’s combative, whiney, rude, and a little terror." D00deitstyler


"Deep down, I really just want to be lazy.I don’t want to go to work, or cook that much, or change the bedding every week, or find part time income streams… Like, in my heart, I just want to lounge about, get a bit drunk and read books or watch youtube videos. I do as much as possible so that she’s comfortable and happy but don’t want to admit that I don’t really WANT to do anything useful." - LeutzschAKS

"The sheer amount of stress I'm under. I do share, but I can't articulate how bad it is." - Herald_of_dooom

“Sometimes the things she says to me in arguments break my heart.” - justVinnyZee

men's psychology

A woman looking at a man with his eyes closed.

Photo credit: Canva

"I served in Iraq and lost my leg. As a result I have severe PTSD…A couple of years after I got out I met my wife. She is an Iraqi Lady and has helped me through the best and worst times. She's given me beautiful children and a reason to carry on. However…her parents moved from Iraq before she was born. Every time I go to her parents house or there is a wedding on her side of the family I attend whilst suffering in silence. Sweaty palms, heart palpitations, shredding feeling where my leg was etc. It drove me to be extremely disrespectful by secretly carrying a hip flask with spirits and cocaine in as it just took the edge off and made it all manageable. Her parents are extremely religious and alcohol and drugs of any kind are heavily frowned upon and banned from the house.The worst is going to her pa rents house as so much of the decorations reminds me of the house I got dragged into after stepping on an IED. I keep this hidden because what can I do? Make her choose between family and me? Absolutely not. Prevent my kids from having grandparents and extended family? Absolutely not. My mental health and my foolish decisions at 16 are not going t o be any form of potential wedge." - Greenlid_42

"That I sometimes buy $20 scratchers when I do the shopping and occasionally throw $60 at large Powerball/MegaMillions jackpots even tho I publicly say 'lotteries are a tax on people who are bad at math.' I do this because I like to dream of a day we don’t have to work and we can follow our passions." - wembley

"The fact that she wont let me put any of my hobby stuff (mostly miniatures and random knickknacks) in our shared spaces without it being in an approved location, meanwhile the entire house is her canvas for her aesthetic. Makes me feel really lonely and small sometimes and like she doesn't care. It's been a topic of conversation, she just doesn't get that delegating me a tiny shelf in her curio isn't the same as letting me actually decorate some." - Kimblethedwarf

“That she is bad at taking criticism, even about the most minor of things. And even saying so is itself a form of criticism she cannot handle. And this has very much hindered our ability to talk to each other.” Aechzen

men's health

A black-and-white photo of a mane and woman looking in opposite directions.

Photo credit: Canva

"I keep my regrets from her. I worry she’ll think less of me if she knew all my past mistakes." Suspicious-Factor362

“Literally anything that isn't within the realm of her personal interests. Otherwise, she makes it clear that she's not really interested in what interests me. Sometimes I do, because I can't keep everything to myself forever, but it just feels like I'm a child bothering their parents talking about how cool their toys are.” ChefBillyGoat

“I’m scared of not being able to provide a half decent life for her and my kids. Life’s getting so expensive and challenging.” Arent_they_all

men's psychology

A man in a suit with his head in his hands

Photo credit: Canva

"Sometimes, the food she cooks isn't great. I will never tell her this because she goes out of her way to cook, and I'm not ungrateful. I can live with bad food that night over her getting upset." - CaptainAwesome0912

"That if I speak to her the same way she speaks to me she would probably spend her whole day in tears. It’s definitely a case of “familiarity breeds contempt” as she does not speak to any of her friends like this (who come over to help with furniture moving, for example), and occasionally it comes out with her family, but the unfettered torrent of complaints and abuse is reserved only for me, regardless of what I do. It’s like she looks for imperfections and mistakes just to point them out." - MusicusTitanicus

“How sad I am that my life isn't a grand adventure but a series of choices i made in order to be able to form and provide for a family…I know there's adventure and excitement to be had still, but I wanted to continue my family line. And dearly love my family. Anything available in that vein will come at cost to my wife and children. So I'm stuck playing rise through the ranks, build the better mouse trap and look good to the suites for another raise or step up the ladder. It's going well, but as it goes well it feels more hollow. I could become head honcho, or start my own enterprise and find massive success, it'd still all been to just provide. Collecting wealth is such a boring pursuit, I hate our society.” BodyRevolutionary167

men's health

A man with a beard looking out a window.

Photo credit: Canva

"I let the kids play Roblox beyond their allowed time." - chelhydra

"She's always in the way. If she's in the kitchen when I'm cooking, she's always standing in front of the next place I need to be. If I'm working outside, she's always in the next place I'm going to go. If I'm fixing something, she's always standing right in front of whatever I'm going to be working on next. If I'm trying to leave a room, she's always in the doorway. I realize she wants to spend time with me, but I really wish she'd just get out of the way when I'm doing something." - Lonecoon

"That when I’m not with her, I put ketchup on my hot dogs." - bipolarcyclops

men's psychology

Someone putting ketchup on a hot dog.

Photo credit: Canva

This article originally appeared on 5.17.24

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Young artist who sold $7 million worth of paintings before she was 14-years-old

You can see her talent in her very first painting.

Autumn De Forest

When Autumn de Forest was 5, she picked up a paintbrush for the first time.

It wasn't long before she was ready to show the world what she could do.

After a year of practice, the then-6-year-old asked her father if he could get her a booth at a local art-in-the-park program.

"People would come up to the booth, and they would talk to my father, and they'd say, 'This is great!'" she said. "Apparently they thought it was Take Your Daughter to Work Day."

Almost everyone thought the artwork was her father's. And when they found out that tiny Autumn was the artist, people couldn't believe their eyes.

Autumn created this piece when she was just 5 years old. Autumn de Forest

Soon, Autumn rose to national fame.

When Autumn was 8, she was featured on the Discovery Health Channel. There was a slew of media attention in the years that followed. There was Disney. There was The Today Show. There was Wendy Williams.

She was called a child genius, a prodigy, and an expert painter.

Autumn de Forest


Suddenly, Autumn de Forest was everywhere.

But not everyone was so accepting of the young artist and her work. Some people in the art world had ... questions. Sure, she was good for a kid. But was her art actually good? Others wondered if the whole thing might be an elaborate hoax .

Autumn decided not to listen.

By 14 she developed a startlingly organized daily routine that went far beyond a 9 to 5.

Somehow, as the focus on her age begins to wear off, Autumn's work ethic and art only grow stronger. She said that most days, she'd wake up in her parents' Las Vegas home at 7:30 a.m. After breakfast, she'd break out her supplies for a one- or two-hour painting session.

From there, she dove into her school work. Most brick-and-mortar schools can't accommodate her travel schedule, so she did the majority of her schooling online.

Before dinner, it's back into the studio.

"That session can last much longer, that can be three or four hours when I really get into it, " she said. "Then I probably have dinner and go to bed. "

Autumn de Forest


The results? They speak for themselves.

Autumn de Forest

Her work has been displayed in galleries and exhibitions all over the world.

Autumn held a public demonstration before a showing at The Butler Institute of American Art.

Autumn de Forest

In 2015, Autumn received the International Giuseppe Sciacca Award in Painting and Art.

The award took her to the Vatican for a private showing of her artwork with the pope.

Autumn de Forest


She's also worked with the President's Committee on the Arts and the Humanities, headed up by Michelle Obama.

As part of the program, de Forest traveled to underprivileged schools around the country and led painting workshops.

Oh, and if you're looking for some hard numbers to attach to Autumn's talent, she's got those, too.

Her paintings raked in over $7 million at auctions by the time she was a teenager — fetching as much as $25,000 each — much of which has gone directly to charities and disaster relief funds.

Autumn de Forest


At 22 years old now, what's Autumn de Forest up to lately?

A lot!

The transition from child prodigy to respected artist has kept her busy.

In 2017, the Monthaven Arts and Cultural Center in Hendersonville, Tennessee hosted a major solo exhibition for de Forest titled "Her White Room: The Art of Autumn de Forest. "

That same year, de Forest was listed as one of Teen Vogue's "21 Under 21." In her profile she was praised for her talent as well as her commitment to art education.

"In dis­advantaged schools, they consider the arts an extracur­ricular activity, " she told Teen Vogue. "It's devastating, as there could be child prodigies in these schools, but they don't know that they have this God-­given gift because they're not given the opportunity because there's nearly no art programs in schools."

In 2018, de Forest was featured in the music video for the song "Youth" by best-selling recording artists Shawn Mendes and Khalid. The video highlights exceptional young people working to change the world, including de Forest, Emma González, and Elias and Zion Phoenix.

The video has over 17 million plays on YouTube.

And of course, Autumn continues to share her absolutely incredible artwork on Instagram and in shows and exhibitions around the globe.

The Autumn de Forest Foundation, helps her keep track of the kids she's met throughout the years and to continue to help them with their art careers.

A portion of the foundation's money goes to a 529 account set up for the students while 10% goes to them directly.

"A lot of these kids that I work with, they're not very old, they're in second grade, third grade, fourth grade. Maybe in 10 years, they may only have four or five thousand dollars but that could be the difference between them going to college or not, " Autumn told Teen Vogue .

Autumn's incredible rise in the art world is an astonishing feat for someone who's still in her teens. But that accomplishment is easily matched by her generosity and commitment to helping develop tomorrow's prodigies as well.

For more information, visit the Autumn de Forest Foundation .


This article originally appeared on 5.30.16

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Pop Culture

Steve from 'Blue's Clues' posted an almost entirely silent video that has 90s kids bawling

Hitting millennials and Gen Zers right where they're at.

John Manard/Wikimedia Commons

Steve Burns at Galaxy Con in 2023

In the wake of the docuseries "Quiet on Set: The Dark Side of Kids TV," kids who grew up watching Nickelodeon are reeling a bit. The documentary unveiled a toxic culture of abuse and exploitation at the network , tainting 90s kids' childhood memories with disturbing behind-the-scenes details of their favorite shows.

But a beacon of light from Nickelodeon still shines in Steve from "Blue's Clues. " Steve Burns may have broken children's hearts when he left the show to go to college, but the beloved host has remained a wholesome icon for millennials and Gen Zers who watched him growing up.

In fact, Steve is still bringing comfort to millions, and his latest video on TikTok is a perfect example of how. In a one-minute TikTok, he says only a handful of words, but people are finding themselves tearing up if not outright bawling by the end of it.

What he does is actually very simple, yet the effect is profound. "Hey, just checking in," he says. "Tell me, what's goin' on?" And then he just looks and listens almost entirely in silence, occasionally nodding along. And if you actually go through the exercise of sharing what's going on with you, even just in your own mind, the compassionate listening he demonstrates feels surprisingly powerful.

If you didn't watch Blue's Clues, this may have felt weird or awkward, but Steve asking questions and then pausing for kids to answer was a hallmark of the show. The kids who grew up watching it are now in the Big Adult Things stage of life, navigating relationships, careers, finances, mental health challenges and more, and it can sometimes feel like too much. So similarly to Elmo's viral check-in on X , having a familiar and compassionate listening ear opened the floodgates.

"Not me crying the instant he asked," wrote one person.

"Not me sitting in bed at almost 3 a.m. in tears because Steve from Blue's Clues shows up on my fyp asking what's going on? The one thing we have left that is pure from our childhood, " wrote another.

"I just cried for over 5 minutes straight," shared another. "I just realized no one has asked me how I'm doing in such a long time. I can't stop crying."

"I couldn't even get out a word all I did was cry, lol" shared another.

Many people shared that the Nickelodeon documentary had rocked their world and found comfort in Steve being Steve.

"After the Nickelodeon documentary, Steve, all I need is Blue's Clues to save whatever is left of this childhood I once had, " wrote one commenter.

"Thank you for being one of the GOOD parts of Nickelodeon, Steve," wrote another.

"Steve checking up on the grown-up kids he left behind is another level of full circle moment," shared another.

"After the Nickelodeon thing we need our Steve now more than ever," agreed another.

And some commenters actually shared the things they are going through, showing why so many people need this kind of check-in:

"Life keeps handing me lemons and I'm not sure how many more I can turn into lemonade. I'm tired, Steve."

"Too much is happening all at once Steve, and idk if I'm getting through it but it's always good to hear from you."

"I lost my mom in January and I'm pregnant with my son…I'm lonely, Steve. I just miss my mom."

"I want to get sober but it's so hard. :("

"I could use a hug, honestly."

Hopefully, Steve's video helped some people realize they really do need someone to talk to so they can seek a therapeutic channel. Thank you, Steve, for giving so many grown-ups the cathartic childhood cry they desperately needed.


This article originally appeared on 3.21.24

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Motherhood

Woman demands half of husband's company in exchange for her being a stay at home mom

She received overwhelming support for her proposal.

Photo credit: Canva

Mom demands half of husband's company to stay home with kids

Having children is a big decision that can alter the course of your life. People often like to have an idea of what their future might look like post children. This is especially true when it comes to financial stability. Planning to have children can be so exciting that it can feel like a damper when the person you're planning with wants to know what will happen if things don't work out between the two of you, or if a child is born with additional needs.

While planning for financial stability as a family unit isn't always fun, it's not as uncomfortable as planning for "what if" scenarios of divorce or death of a spouse. But those conversations are just as important as deciding how many children to have, where to live and what religion in which you want to raise your children.

One woman turned to Reddit to ask if she was wrong for demanding her husband help to secure her future with a 50% stake in the company after he asked her to be a stay at home mom .

The woman and her husband already have children and she has remained a working mom throughout the entirety of their parenting journey together. But the couple have a third child on the way and according to the anonymous user, her husband caught her off guard by suddenly asking her to be a house wife.

woman holding baby beside man smiling Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

"I was very disturbed by that but he explained that it was better for our family and children since he can afford very good living. After a few weeks thinking I told him that I would agree but only if I get 1/2 his company," the woman says.

She further explains that his request is due to him feeling stressed out and anxious that the children are in the care of "strangers " at daycare. Though whether one parent will stay at home with the children is typically discussed before those children exist the Reddit poster shares that they both loved their careers so the idea of quitting to stay home wasn't discussed. But the request to receive 50% of the company didn't come without thought.

Giphy

When women leave the workforce to care for children, they are often economically punished when attempting to re-enter their field. The employment gap on their resume is a hinderance and their upward mobility in their sector is halted at whatever level they were in when they exited the workforce. Choosing to stay home is a big risk to the person's individual financial security should they end up divo rcing or the relationship becomes financially abusive.

"I explained further that the more I stay at home the less chance I would have to find a well paying job should we ever divorce because I would have less merits, while he would stay making more money each year. So I want half of the company. If we never divorce, which is the goal of all marriages then it wouldn’t matter but should it end, it would be the price of me staying home and raising our children so he could be less worried and stressed out, " she writes.

@meredyth_with_a_why   #stitch with @Ally #tradwife   #traditionalwife   #sthm   #stayathomemom   #stayathomewife   ♬ original sound - Meredyth Willits

Shelley Correll, Stanford professor and director of the Stanford VMware Women’s Leadership Innovation Lab, tells Forbes , “Frankly, I would worry about women or men using these options. While my research showed that signaling parenthood on a job application leads to penalties for mothers but not fathers, more recent research shows that when fathers show a commitment to caregiving, they are penalized the same way mothers are and sometimes worse.”

The research on the "motherhood penalty" is pretty clear and aligns with why the woman wants equity in the company, but she was chastised by her best friend for making such a request. That's when she turned to the social media platform to find out if others also felt that she made a mistake. Commenters quickly sided with the woman.

three women sitting beside table Photo by Tim Gouw on Unsplash

"NTA and you shouldn't bend on this. You have as much a right to a secure financial future as he does. If he won't do this, he can't afford you or he is looking to create a power imbalance that puts you at a disadvantage, " someone advises, adding that the woman should not consult her friends on "marital business. "

"To me, this sounds reasonable for exactly the reasons you've given. You don't want to be the bitter woman finding out in her 50s that waiting tables is her only option because her professional career skills have passed their due date, and your husband has moved on. You don't want to be trapped in a loveless or even abusive marriage because you're financially dependent. And you don't want to be a SAHM begging her husband for an allowance, " another writes.

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"This is correct. OP, when I read your friends’ reactions to your request, I was shocked. I applaud you for thinking ahead. No one wants to believe they will get divorced, but it does happen, and often, and it’s the SAHP who ends up struggling because they have been out of the job market for so long. Protecting yourself is smart. Like you said, if you never divorce, which is the goal, then it doesn’t matter what you own, but if you do divorce, you’re protected from living in a one bedroom apartment and working at Walmart. Good for you, " someone else shares.

In the end the woman's husband did agree to hand over equity in the company at 49% so he could maintain the controlling share but she would have future financial stability.

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