On April 26, 2018, the last college class finally ended. As usual, I just feel that the May Day holiday is coming. It seems so, but when I walked out of the class door, I felt disappointed.

Entering and leaving school, students will become teachers in a twinkling of an eye. It is also about to move from the ocean to the starry sky. Before entering the deeper darkness, I was impressed with a white dress when I entered the school. When I left, my pink shirt was a touch of melancholy.

What should I write to commemorate this hurried day? I turn over the history and intend to look for my own shadow from the dust of the past. Each shadow slowly flows out like flowing water, and then a bit of thick ink emerges to slowly depict myself.

On September 22, 2015, "University, Dream, Wish One Heart" (excerpt)
I studied in "Jiangnan beyond the Great Wall", no matter how far or near, this is a new beginning for me. So, after my head got hot, I started an unprecedented attempt: to face the world in a high profile.
So I finally got my wish to participate in class management. This is a new challenge for me. All kinds of people, all kinds of things, look at everything to make everyone satisfied - the result is not satisfied.
I am very depressed, especially I am not satisfied with myself. So I wandered silently on my way, looking for a drugstore to relieve my troubles.
I found it. I can't satisfy everyone, but I can satisfy a large number of people, satisfy myself, and let myself have a clear conscience. Be good at yourself. After all, people are wonderful creatures in this world.

It seemed that I was the first blog post published in the university after the website was filed. I wrote the following words and hurried to walk in the campus. At that time, I seemed very busy, but after a while, what was busy?

Or, what did you really learn? I don't know, my empty eyes are empty. After all, they are empty.

If you ask me whether I regret my choice, I will certainly not regret it. It has already become the past. Even if I regret, I will never have a chance. It is cowardly to hide in your memory. Unfortunately, I may not be. From childhood to adulthood, I was like a puppet, and in that period of time, I was slowly tasting my puppet, slowly tearing myself apart, slowly, and completely splitting myself apart.

On October 6, 2015, Jiang Chenwei Life (1) (excerpt)
Since I entered the campus on September 4, 2015, I knew that my new journey had begun. I was wearing a white shirt and a pair of light blue jeans. Of course, now I wear a solid color, such as pure white and khaki.
I don't know why I wear this way, just as I don't know why I cut off my "long hair".
"What do I know?"
I know that I was exhausted every day in college, but I like this feeling. I want to change, because once I was tired of this state. Of course, including now.
However, the holiday came. The 14 day holiday destroyed the still established "Jiang Chen", but inspired the hidden "Jiang Chen".
Many people know that Jiang Chen is just my name on the Internet, and the result of Baidu is my blog "Dream Chen Feng". To be honest, the career I want to engage in most is related to the Internet. Even if I am asked to do copywriting every day
However, after I came to the Normal University, and because of the agreement, I am 90% likely to become a people's teacher. Recalling the accusation against the "people's teacher" in Dream Diary, I am afraid I will become the new "people's teacher".
Unless I can get rid of that bondage - money.
Money is a good thing. Let a "Wu Zhong" change from "indifferent" to a positive thing. Even a decimal place can make you difficult to move. In particular, there are not a few people who live for it in life.
Write here, finish what you want to say, and stop writing. I went out of my "little dark room" and came to the yard. I listened to the bleating of sheep and watched them gnaw grass, just like we gnawed our parents, from young to old, until we had gnawed our roots. The capable sheep have arrived at the grassland.
If there is a seal, if there is paper, you can only eat yourself. If you bite a few lice, you can barely make a living. Looking up at the stars every day is just a mouthpiece for tomorrow. Look for a little water at the bottom of the well. Even if it is polluted, it is also regarded as manna happily. Little did they know that out of the wellhead, it was a mountain spring.
The environment has bound us, and the network has liberated us. We tremble in reality, and we spout words on the Internet, which combine into two colorful and black and white worlds of life. Until the end, blending into gray.
Smiling, I put on my backpack and embarked on a new journey. No matter what happens, I will forgive everything on behalf of God, remember everything on behalf of the Emperor, and thank everything on behalf of Satan. The former is the time, the middle is the time, and the latter is the future.

On October 29, 2015, Jiang Chenwei Life (7) (excerpt)
Every moment of laughter and abuse in life is tense. No one knows whether the next moment is an open gun or a hidden arrow. I don't know who will remember the characters I wrote at this moment? Yesterday's provocation is still around my ears, today I have a shoulder to shoulder, and after countless smiling faces, they are all cold blades.
Originally placed everything to fantasy, from false to true. However, it is found that the truth is false.

I looked at @ 5258 and commented below, "How can I be absent when so many people are here? After reading this article, it seems that your evaluation of you is true

With a calm smile, there was nothing wrong with what he said. In the dream Chen Feng, I wrote a total of 656 articles. Which one is not complaining of illness? When you are really sick, don't you just hold yourself in the corner to heal yourself? How many people are willing to tear up the real wound and sprinkle salt on it for others to watch?

One glance, one stroke, one hesitates. How many people can understand the reason of my freehand brushwork in the past? It seems that few people have paid attention to the story behind it, and no one knows the charm of it. For all things, it seems that it is really sick.

On November 13, 2015, After Retrospection (excerpt)
I just want to write a paragraph of words in my heart quietly, not for anyone to see, but for a clear conscience.
For some reason, my college life gradually made me lose my direction, just like a lonely boat in the dark, unable to see the Beidou in the sky, leaving only a few shivers and fears in the drift.
Day after day busy, my weight dropped from 66 to 64, but after busy, I could only lie in bed, silently thinking of insomnia, I want to talk to you but I don't know who to tell you, I want to run but I have no strength
Apart from that, when I brought the computer over, I had planned to record everything slowly with articles. However, when the memory module did not arrive, I chose to remain silent at tortoise speed, slowly reliving it in silence, just like cattle and sheep ruminating, leaving some dregs, and turning my head to vomit in nobody's place.
After spitting out, we should also carefully look around, and slowly bury the residue in the dark earth, into the world where no one cares about it, just like the disappearance of "sharp Chen Feng" in the online world, to just do "Guanguan Jujiu, in the river island, a beautiful lady, a gentleman's good match~~"
After all, I became more and more afraid, especially after everything was open and transparent, when the express posted its ID card number, I knew that there were countless "Jiang Chen" identities escorting four or five pieces of goods to Xinjiang.

Busy, will eventually be tired, and then a sad face lying in bed. However, the world won't care whether you are sad or tired. People always care about their own interests. When you break their agreement, they will all tell you what to do, hate you to the extreme, and show disgusting fangs to you.

However, those who did not abide by the agreement at the beginning avoided it and did not dare to speak. Because you are good, they think you should abide by their rules. So why be a kind person?

Your kindness is nothing but the fearless capital of others.

However, I still wish you kindness.

On January 14, 2016, Looking Back at the First Experience of University (excerpt)
A person, slowly walking on the road of learning. Before I knew it, I had lost track of my original purpose. However, when I looked back after a long walk, I felt how lucky I was that I didn't take a turn. There are always countless crossroads on the way forward, and I miraculously chose here.
Don't say it's chicken soup. Because I will tell you that other roads have been broken, and those destroyed have no dross. I can only relive the warmth at the end of darkness after the so-called light falls. On the way forward, there may not be support, but there will be countless scissors from the authority to cut your branches. Let you, in the dark（ light ）China is moving towards the so-called right bank. So that you don't know whether it is love or hate. You can only blame yourself in silence. Perhaps in the infinitely distant future, you will become the so-called "authority" again

If you really think what you are suitable for and what you can do, then follow your heart.

The authority chosen by you may make you feel comfortable, but that is not what you like. If you wake up at night in the future, don't be upset. After all, you never fight.

**On March 20, 2016, The University I Want, Pursuing My Dream (excerpt)
The bath to purify the soul did not go, and the plan to borrow books from the library did not come true. A document puts five years of youth on the responsibility of teaching and educating people. I don't know if what I do is what I love. As I once wrote, if I became a people's teacher, how would I teach and educate people? It may bring Mr. Qu's shadow inexplicably.
Dreams are ethereal and elusive. Writing as money and survival, I can not write what I love. But to give up one's hobby for survival, one can only be happy and happy in pain. I remember saying that it is good to have more skills but not more skills. However, what's the use of having more skills but not more skills? Chinese teachers have felt a sense of saturation here. There will be more and more ways for the society to survive. Marketing strategy, code writing, and article writing are all art: it is difficult to achieve the extreme, but there is definitely a ticket to the extreme. The world may no longer be famous after Van Gogh's death.

It seems that it was from this moment that I began to slowly find my dream.

It was at this time that I began to think about what I really needed.

Unfortunately, from the beginning to the end, I only vaguely saw the word "freedom". Empty, empty, I don't know what it is, I don't know all the time.

From this period of time on, I began to be obsessed with freehand life, and even wrote life into stories, such as "Counting all the secrets of heaven, not all your heart". Even today, I still can not be regarded as a daughter.

In other words, I have never seen anyone's heart clearly.

……

Once young and frivolous, but eventually learned to keep a low profile silence;
Once rebellious, but eventually learned to smooth edges and corners.

Fortunately, this period of growth, from the beginning to the end, lived up to the courage and pride of the past. The end, the beginning, I, or me.

The wind rises and the clouds rise for several times, and the clamour in the corner is cold and quiet.
When I first came to my dream, my eyes were green and affectionate.
How many people know about it? The sword dance startled the goose and shattered the dreams of other places. Since then, no one has lived in the hometown.

One person in the middle of the night with lights on, a beautiful lady in the distance, an empty city.
There is no trace in the Jianghu when drunk. Looking back, the city is empty.

In a few words, everything will end, just live up to the past.