My January (1)

On the last day of 2006, I stood in the deserted Outer Ring Road to examine my love. From the initial heartbreak to the final indifference, I stood in the tail of winter and watched my love disappear, leaving many scars and pretending nothing. This winter is nothing special. When the wind shakes over the decadent plane trees, only the branches are left. The rustling sadness can still flow out.

I have been waiting for you, but the phone has been very quiet.

I still remember the sunny day on the Outer Ring Road, and the curve of the plane cloud meanders to write the summary of the story. I have been waiting for you, but I have been waiting for you; I didn't wait for you, but I have been waiting for you. It turns out that even if the order is out of order, it still has the same meaning... Looking at the buses passing by from time to time, I have a delusion in my heart. From then on, I don't mention the past or the future.

But I have reason to believe that the afternoon of October 5 really existed. In that afternoon, the cold left hand held the right hand that had never been held. It seemed that everything became very delicate, so the eyes had temperature and the palm had humidity, and the mood was as free as a horse on the edge of happiness. There are many beautiful things, I don't know how they started, but when I looked back, there were bright and sad flowers on both sides of the road when I came.

Hehe, when he is happy, he invents a dream to deceive himself. Only you know whether you are happy or not.

Maybe there is really no one in the world who can be consistent with another. Stubbornly hold memories, too many inexplicable moved. It turns out that everyone in the world is always in a hurry, and no one is destined to stay with anyone. Jiezi said, "If you slip away from this one, we will have another one." After listening to this, I clapped the table and laughed wildly to hide my sadness and reluctance. At last, the laughter stopped suddenly in the air, which made my head blank for a second. Maybe this is the way I always wanted to be, but when the truth unfolds in front of me, I just feel very panic. Sudden feelings can make people feel panic!

I'm just sad. What am I sad about?

Not to flaunt but to look forward to, my memory is full of footprints. When winter comes to a certain extent, it can't be bright. God only gives me dusk day by day, and the sun will always be like a candle shadow. I want to open the lid. All day long stiff yearning and waiting in the same place make me totally trapped in a situation of self isolation, which is like a coffin holding my body. No matter how expressive I am, I can only be intoxicated by the limitations of expressiveness. People always use the excuse that they are engaged in some kind of rebellion and resistance. In fact, they are trapped in their own psychological contradictions or confusion.

Pursue for nothing.

After you leave

Stop everything

But it's noisy

But none of us is wrong

Only blame the mood that day

Facing you or the past

I can't decide

Because one revolution of the earth has decided your future

Just wait for confirmation

The clock goes up and down grid by grid. The light and shadow are changeable and unpredictable. I'm just a little sad.

In January, I hibernate painfully.

My January (2)

It was written to November, which was as elegant as a deer and as hasty as a mouse
In November, the sky is blue and the clouds are white. The charming sunshine and the cold monsoon are so graceful around the neck in winter, so she walks gracefully in November like a deer.
The high school seniors who are in chaos have reached one third. It's just that the classroom where the chalk is flying is still noisy. The boys are discussing the latest NBA game, and the girls are gathering to share gossip information. During the break, there are still young couples in the corner making "love talk", and in class, you can see notes flying all over the sky. Only occasionally, a teacher gently mentioned it between lectures. Time is running out. Only when I heard this sentence can I feel everyone's solemn and stirring. This sense of solemnity is fleeting, which makes me wonder whether my feelings really existed.
In fact, everything is real, because life is real. Life will never change a bit because it is November, just as elegant November will not be a bit panic because the college entrance examination is approaching. So I lived elegantly in November, in the northern monsoon and warm sun.
My name is Yan Xiaohe, and my beloved friend Jinnian calls me Xiaohe. She is a very quiet child, a little older than me. I think she really loves me, because she never let me comfort her pain, but she listened to my noise quietly again and again, and gently told me that everything would be fine. She said that everything would be fine. I believed it because I loved her so much.
Often, I like to dream in boring Chinese classes. Although I realized later that this was an extremely wrong behavior, my thoughts sometimes did not obey rational consciousness. My Chinese teacher is a tall and thin girl. She opens her mouth very wide when she speaks, which makes people hard to hear. So I often drowsy in the sunshine, having messy dreams, and secretly drooling.
In her ears, she sang softly: like dying in the sun, like dying in the sun... It was such a psychedelic and ethereal voice. I sleep in the sun in November, I dream in June, and I am wrapped in a huge confusion. The crowd is so noisy. Life is so lively. The college entrance examination is so far away, and you are so near.
I fell asleep.

My January (3)

Those days are no longer coming back. In November, I began to be displaced. After the half term exam, Qiang and I went to the roof of the school to drink beer, and let the wind blow in the southeast and northwest. We slept together on the fragrant days in Qingdao. Look at the falling meteors in the sky.

I thought a lot, and then I burst into tears.

I want to write down everything in my heart in November. The sky is in the place where I belong. November passes quickly. The drifting wind and drifting rain are flying endlessly in life. Does the youth without complaint really have to be handed over to the sea of learning.

In November, I began to lose in the real world.

I am lost in this November, looking at this day in my eyes rigid.

Every day, I wander in November.

In November, I began to be displaced. My parents may be disappointed. I am a failure. Since then, I will go to the rooftop of the school every night to drink beer, and my heart will chill.

From then on, I began to wander in November, and many stories ended here.

I wrote these words with tears in my eyes. I found that I had already shed tears, and I was glad that I still had tears.

In November, I began to wander in the flower season, and began to be displaced.

My January (4)

It took me several months to get the album that made me think day and night - Chopin in November at 12:45 p.m. on November 2.

At noon that day, I was too busy to eat. After pressing the last remaining heat for 45 minutes, the bell finally exploded when it rang, and I flew out of the classroom. At that time, I only felt the wind blowing on my face, and I was "swishing" in the wind. There was no one in the school. I was the first student to come out. Wow! I have been striving for the "first" for more than two years, and I actually hung my neck in such a hurry. Then I took a taxi three minutes later. All the way, my eyes were glued to the naughty meter. I said, "Be good and don't jump." It jumped more and more. My heart beat as fast. I was worried about the fate of the "silver" in my pocket.

what a coincidence! Thank God Allah Buddha Guanyin. The owner of "Guowen" audio and video store seems to be sweating and drooling greedily to transport a box of tapes into the store. I flew into the store, and before the boss could rest, I put the money into his hand: "Chopin!" The boss was at 0. After a second of inactivity, I pulled out a box from a dozen tapes stacked together and gave it to me without thinking about the huge profits that Jay had brought to him again. I thought the boss would say to me, "Congratulations, you are the first customer to buy Jay's new album in our store, and you will get a gift from our store..." Regardless of this, the genuine copy of 24 yuan can be pirated for 4 yuan, but I can't care so much now. Looking back on the feelings that have been lingering in my heart for months, don't you just rely on this album? And as time approaches, the urgency, like a lighted lead, becomes more and more intense. The song of the future says: support the genuine version, support Jay. For a middle school student, he really has no ability, even luxury. However, an inexplicable impulse in the subconscious said: buy the genuine, support Jay

It is the inherent cool expression that makes people have a desire to penetrate the cover. The sunny tone, Western European architecture and a classical piano can smell the romantic classical factors hidden by Jay from the cover! Open the cartridge, load the walkman that has been prepared in advance, and the heart starts to touch a new side of Jay's world

A week later. When I walk in the central street, a week of closed life makes me feel separated from the world, but the only constant is the Nocturne of Jay, which is heard everywhere. This is not the main theme of Chopin in November, because every song of Jay is carefully produced.

I know from the album that my idol is Chopin. The god of music involves other factors besides music in the characteristics of music and propaganda, which is full of strong Western European culture and religious color. From the music, it seems to see a magnificent man-made world.

In order to combine foreign music elements with Chinese traditional music elements, he established his own music style. More importantly, he introduced Chinese classical music elements to the music world, which is not tried by other singers, but also an innovation in the new era. Most people listen to pop music with their eyes closed. In fact, listening to some of Jay's music, you will realize that classical and popular are not a pair of antonyms, but the perfect product under Jay's piano keys, a miracle. Don't believe it? Listen to this album. To be exact, you have gone through another world of flowers.

I obviously feel that Jay's singing skill has made a great leap. His childish intelligence has disappeared, and he has become more stable, mature, experienced and vicissitudes of life. When he sang Coral Sea, I knew that Jay's songs were not sung, but more about music, others, feelings, beauty and life. In any case, he will adhere to his own beliefs, and his personality includes persistence after self reflection. He is a human being, but if he does something that human beings cannot do, he can be a "god", the god of music.

My January (5)

I have never had a good opinion of autumn, except that it is easy to express sadness when dead leaves are everywhere. What's more, there are always people there who sweep leaves, three times a day, more frequently than eating.

Besides, the maple, which should have been popular all over the mountains, can't be so popular here. In short, autumn is a holiday. Not only in autumn, but also in spring, there are no flowers in bloom, no lotus in summer and insects chirping, and winter is not the origin of ice sculpture. The mountain is too low, the water is not clear enough, the clouds are thin and loose, and people are busy. I remember looking at the mountain from the window at night. The wind was loud enough to make sparks in my ears. The mountain stood heavily and abruptly under the limited sky. The wind could not blow any branches around it, nor could it blow its poor heart.

The night with the moon is better. In summer, it is still the window. I wrote something by the moonlight, and I can vaguely see several graves in the opposite mountain. They are very small. Most of the heaviness of the mountain is related to the soul. It locks its heart in a similar grave, without knowing how long the time has passed. It is a natural force or an artificial force, and it is dead silent. The heart, together with the graves, was run over by machines and wind.

The wind is powerful. If you stand in the wind for many years, you say, are you buried by sand or weathered.

The other day I saw a bird falling vertically from the sky, and then flapping its wings at the moment when it was close to the ground. My eyes are bad. There are some black things. I regard them as birds that stay there all the year round.

Like those false seasons, low and heavy mountains and hopeless hearts, we spend our youth, which is nothing at all, in a hasty manner, for joy and pain. Then I hope that one day, like that free falling bird, it will have full wings and live for itself.

It's really cold. It's cold on my knees, hands and back. I'm afraid of winter every year, like an old man.

This is the old man at the end of 15 years old. She said that she would always be 15 years old and would keep turning back and leaving. I have lost my interest in looking at the mountain in front of the window. The cold has forced me into bed, but I hide in the warm place, thinking about something irrelevant. It is not consistent with the age, rather, it is the future, about the future.

"This life is still too exciting. Nothing I thought I could grasp."

It's always an awkward situation, I don't know where to put it and it, I don't know where he went with her carelessly, I don't even know what I was like before. Was I afraid of cold before? Maybe I haven't changed. It's this day. I'm approaching the coldest time. At that time, I really felt that three years, nine years and twelve years were nothing but the time of blooming.

Don't think too much. Don't always think about what you don't need.

November 8, 2008.

My January (6)

Suddenly I remembered my lost time, which scattered on my way in 2005, but I never looked back

Those days are no longer coming back. In November, I began to be homeless. After the half term exam, I went to the roof of the school with Qiang to drink beer. Let the wind blow in the southeast, northwest and northwest. We slept together in the fragrant days of Qingdao and watched the meteors fall in the sky

I thought a lot, and then I burst into tears

I really want to write down everything in my heart. In November, the sky is just where I belong, and the meteors fall. In November, the drifting wind and the drifting rain are flying in life. Does the youth without resentment really have to be handed over to the sea of learning

In November, I began to lose in the real world

I am lost in this November, looking at this day in my eyes rigid

Every day, I wander in November

In November, I began my life of displacement. My parents may be disappointed. I am a failure. Since then, I will go to the roof of the school every night to drink beer, and my heart will chill

From then on, I began to wander in November, and many stories ended here

I wrote these words with tears in my eyes. I found that I had already shed tears, and I was glad that I still had tears

In November, I began to wander in the flower season, and began to be displaced

My January (7)

In retrospect, the day that made me unforgettable was when it snowed in Changsha in January. Early in the morning, I looked out from the dim window and found that it was snowing heavily outside. When I came outside, I saw young trees standing in the heavy snow. I looked up and saw that the roof and windows were covered with a thick layer of snow. The earth became a world wrapped in snow. Naughty little snowflakes are blown on people's faces, hands and heads from time to time by the wind. From time to time, people's heads dripped with small crystal beads. A piercing cold wind blew, and people pulled their clothes tighter. I stretched out my hand, and the snowflakes fell on my hand, cold and cold. At this time, I saw a young aunt in the heavy snow. Although she looked ordinary, her every move moved me deeply. She saw her left hand carrying vegetables for the old woman, and her right hand holding an old man over sixty. At first, I thought it was nothing special. Maybe it was her parents. But later, when she watched the two old men enter the house, she walked away without looking back. I looked at her figure and saw her disappear into the vast snow. Ah! What pure and good snow! You let this aunt have a pure heart like yours. Although the snow was not big, it left a deep impression on me, which made me remember 350 words of January composition