1. When you receive this message, your mobile phone has been poisoned. Please take off your clothes within 30 seconds and rotate for 10 circles, or your mobile phone will be disabled and you will still laugh! Take it off!

2. There was a woman who was ugly, but she was narcissistic. One day she said that if beauty was a mistake, I would rather be wrong. I told her that you didn't make a mistake at all.

3. Once upon a time, there were four monkeys. The first one covered his eyes and could not see, the second one covered his mouth and did not speak, the third one blocked his ears and did not listen, and the fourth one held the phone and smiled!

4. When the magpie comes, mother says it is a bird of joy and a guest; Swallow comes, mother says it is beneficial bird and guest; When crow comes, the child asks if you are also a guest? The crow cries: Yes, I am a hacker!

5. Poetry mix and comment: 1. The strong grass is known by the strong wind, and the sky is high enough for birds to fly. (Fly a bird, the wind is so strong!) 2. Raise your head and look at the bright moon. Tears flow when you sing. (Brother is lonely!)

6. A hundred years ago, you were my senior worker. I liked you when I peeped at your firewood cutting posture at the window that day. Don't blame me for not telling you! Because there was no short message at that time!

7. Customer: I paid the same price. Why was the steak given to me yesterday big and tender, but today it is small and old? Waiter: Because you were sitting near the window yesterday.

8. Your happiness, I will build; I will make up for your confusion; Your greed, I will meet; I will give in to your caprice; I am the only one who loves you. I am a pig farmer.

9. Do you know why we are predestined? In fact, we knew each other a thousand years ago. One day, you ran a long way with me and left a tooth mark on me. It became a story through the ages. At that time, my name was Lv Dongbin.

10. When a teacher saw a student hand in a book and planned to find a "Chuan" character to teach him, he suddenly saw a "three" character and scolded, "I've been looking for you everywhere, but you are lying here sleeping late!"!

11. At the end of the call, the man said gently, "Hang up first." The girl smiled and said, "No, hang up first.

12. I wish you: Every day, there will be a "Dinner", and you can make money from "Promise". Love is like "Love Sage", righteousness is like "Huo Yuanjia", body is like "King Kong", and everything goes well beyond "Myth".

13. You are a man with ten hearts, and you often have fun with 9. 8. You can't afford to have hundreds of millions of money. You abandon 7 all the year round, and reach 6 all the time to find prey. 5. You need to ask more questions, 4. If you don't change your nature, 3. You have 2 minds and 2 minds, you must not be a good person.

14. The woman said to the matchmaker: You cheat! He is blind in one eye. Why didn't you tell me before? Media Man: Why didn't I tell you? When you met for the first time, I said: He liked you at a glance.

15. The sunrise in the East China Sea and the sunset in the West Mountain will lead to sorrow and joy; When things go wrong, people are comfortable and their hearts are comfortable; I often talk with my friends. I have talked with them in ancient times and today. It's not that immortals are better than immortals!

16. One day I didn't want to see you, my eyes were straight and I was breathless. I picked up the phone three times, my limbs were cold and sweating, my insides were sighing, and my mouth was full of blame. As time passed, I had an idea. I waited for you before ten o'clock.

17. Women in the new century: they can go to the hall, get out of the kitchen, write codes, find abnormalities, kill wooden horses, climb walls, drive good cars, buy new houses, fight and fight hooligans.

18. When a man is in love, he will have his wife like clothes - the fashion is so changeable, and the cost of clothes is becoming increasingly expensive; Men don't have a good thing - but it is the biggest buyer market for women after all.

19. Today, Bajie asked Tang Monk: Master, is the world really my ugliest? Tang Monk looked embarrassed and said: Go and ask Sister Guanyin! Bajie came back from Guanyin and asked happily: Ho ho, master, who is XXX? ha-ha!

20. The weather changes quickly, and the cold wind comes quietly. I care for you because you are cute! The quilt should be covered at night to prevent the feet from freezing. If you have nothing to do, you can chew bones, so you can supplement calcium. Don't say I'm too bad. Wish you a happy day!

21. What happened? When I dialed your mobile phone, the voice prompt said please dial the area code of the zoo before the number you dialed. I can't believe it. I dialed again, and the voice prompt said that the owner had fallen asleep in spring! Are you... OK?

22. If you want, I will watch you affectionately until you surrender; If you wish, I will tell you affectionately until you become a sheep; If you dare, I will come all the way to support you. Do you dare to admit that you are a donkey?

23. I have always stayed by your side and worried about you again and again. Are you full today? Did you have a good night? Is it cold late at night? I always knew that you just couldn't take care of yourself. Whenever I walked away, you would jump out of the pigpen.

24. When the mother and son of flies were having dinner, the son frowned and asked the mother, "Mom, why do we eat shit every day?" The mother said, "Don't say such disgusting words when eating, eat while it's hot!"

25. I really want to invite you to dinner, but there is no water supply during the day and no power supply at night, so I can't afford to pay for white noodles. Open Deng's theory to find the answer: it's the primary stage of socialism, and turn it back: his grandmother, unchanged for a hundred years! What can I buy you for dinner?

26. These days, marriage is called access to the Internet, bigamy is called one card and two numbers, extramarital love is called call transfer, lovers are mostly called mobile dream, divorce is called cancellation, separation is called shutdown and number retention, and women remarry is called transfer. The remarriage of men is called card replacement, and the exchange is called Unicom.

27. Who is the most patriotic among several classmates? A said, "I never buy foreign goods." B said, "I never watch foreign movies." C looked up at the sky and shouted, "I never pass the foreign language exam."

28. ldquo; Can a person kneel in the middle of the road prove that he is drunk? " "Of course not, sir," replied the traffic, "but this gentleman is kneeling in the middle of the road to roll up the white line painted in the middle of the road.

29. You can't even remember the names of the eight famous families in Tang and Song dynasties (Tao Yuanming, Guo Moruo, Lu You, Xin Qiji, Li Qingzhao, Qu Yuan, Xu Zhimo, Wang Musheng). But I can remember the names of dozens of members of Korean wave groups, such as EXO and AKB48. I really feel sad for the next generation of our country.