It is normal for children to have emotions. As parents, they should treat this matter correctly. Whether he is crying or angry, there is a reason. As a parent, when facing children's negative emotions, don't worry, let alone be impatient. To help children sort out their emotions and understand their feelings, how to deal with their emotional problems?
How to deal with children's emotional problems?
First, be aware of emotions.
Correct emotional awareness is the first step of emotional counseling. Emotion awareness includes recognizing one's own emotions and interpreting children's emotions. Chinese parents tend not to express their emotions in front of their children. Even if they sometimes do or say things that hurt their children because of excessive anger, they are not accustomed to admit their mistakes in front of children, thinking that they will lose their dignity as parents.
Chinese parents also pay little attention to the common negative emotions in their families. We should actually learn to tell your child what you think, listen to his response, and continue talking. If you find yourself in a rage and unable to calm down, you should temporarily avoid making actions or words that hurt the child.
Second, realize that the moment when emotions are generated is an opportunity to get close and teach.
Psychological knowledge tells us that children need their parents most when they are sad, angry or afraid. These emotional moments are the time for children's hearts to seek help, and also the opportunity for parents to get the most close to their hearts. Parents who are good at emotional counseling will grasp each of these fragments and teach children to learn the skills to comfort themselves and master emotional changes, so that they can use them for life.
Third, listen to and affirm children's feelings with empathy.
Once you understand that the moment when emotions arise is an opportunity to build feelings and teach to solve problems, you can start to listen with empathy, which is the most important step in the emotional coaching process. Of course, you don't need to have time to deal with children's emotions every time, but if you decide to have emotional counseling, you must put aside the things at hand and listen attentively and sincerely. If you don't have time at that time, you must also tell your child frankly, and don't keep a coping attitude.
Fourth, help children describe their emotions.
A simple but very important step in emotional counseling is to help children describe their emotions when they have emotional reactions. We should teach children to describe their emotions with such words as nervousness, worry, fear, anger, sadness, and jealousy, which can help children transform an invisible, scary, and uncomfortable feeling into something that can be defined, bounded, and is part of normal life. Children will understand that everyone will experience these feelings, and everyone can deal with them.
Fifth, establish norms and help them solve problems.
This is the most important step. Parents must understand that what we should regulate is improper behavior, not their emotions. We should determine the problem, confirm their emotions, and then discuss with them how to solve the emotional problems. Every parent loves their children, but if there is only love without corresponding skills, our love for children may be lost.
How to deal with children's emotional problems?
1、 Understand children's emotional characteristics, understand, respect and respect children.
Different from adults, children's emotions are often direct and intense. A trivial matter in the eyes of adults can make children jump with excitement or cry with anger. In short, children's emotions are extremely exposed, lack of control, and easily changed.
Understanding the emotional characteristics of children will help parents view everything from the perspective of children rather than the requirements of adults from the perspective of children. When children's bad emotions grow, parents will be able to take an attitude of understanding and respect, not ignore them, ignore them, nor ignite in the public, nor suppress them, but patiently, calmly and correctly face them, Help with facilitation.
2、 Keep a good mood and be a guide for children's healthy growth.
Parents are often the first teachers that children imitate. What kind of attitude parents take to deal with life and difficulties is a great hint to their children. Parents are in a bad mood, reticent or emotional fluctuations, and irritable. Children are also cautious or irritable and paranoid, which is contrary to parents' tolerance, optimism, calm and other good emotions, It plays a positive and imperceptible exemplary role in the healthy growth of children.
In daily life, parents' love and kindness for others, tolerant and understanding attitude, and the excellent mood of laughter for life have great influence on children. Therefore, being parents, being the master of your own mood, and being a lover of life is extremely important for children's growth, especially for the healthy growth of psychology.
3、 Parents should let children learn to adjust their emotions in various emotional experiences.
To let children gradually learn to control their own emotions, instead of letting their emotions control them, parents must be a conscientious person. When children have loneliness, fear of gratitude, or other negative emotions are parents, they should consciously give correct evaluation and positive guidance. When children experience positive emotions such as success and happiness, parents can give praise and encouragement, and timely tell children that you can do better, really capable, and so on.
Encouraging words or applications will greatly strengthen the children's happy mood. When the children are upset and depressed, parents can give appropriate guidance. The right analytical guidance can often turn children's anger into joy. Turn worry into joy and depression into excitement.